Leaving the silence behind. During my time in Costa Rica I had ample time to reflect and space to be creative. I built up lots of enthusiasm and was excited to get back home and start putting into practice the ideas I had developed.
And then I got home.
I’ve been home for two weeks now and I’m only just starting to feel my energy pick up and feel like I have a grasp on life. The difficulty of the transition took me by surprise.
I was so excited to bring back Costa Rica with me, and so excited to grasp the life I was missing with all I had once I got back- and then I was so tired and overwhelmed all I felt like doing was huddling into a ball in my bed. I was very caught up with trying to keep up with regular life. It was hard not to feel like I failed.
The truth is that I didn’t fail, I just didn’t allocate any time for transition. Despite the want to be at my best the moment I stepped off the plane, the reality was very different. The only thing I really failed were my own unrealistic expectations.
It helped just realizing that it is a transition. It’s not that I just “Can’t do regular life anymore” or that “I have lost everything I gained in Costa Rica”. It just simply is a transition. An in-between time of readjusting. If I can allow for the space to transition, it brings into mind a possibility of creating the type of transition I want. Giving full permission for the process to happen. And deliberately setting myself up to have a good transition – as its’ own special time that has its’ own purpose and value.
It was yet another good learning experience. To have patience, compassion, to identify what I wanted to implement and the permission to hold off on the actual implementation. To know that I still have access to everything I had before, and belief that with time and recuperating the energy and enthusiasm would re-ignite. If you can accept what your now is (especially when it’s different than what you expected) it gives you a new chance to create what you need. Letting go of your previous expectations and responding to what you need in the moment. Even when that doesn’t involve changing your action – a huge shift happens when you fully embrace with compassion what you are doing (like relaxing on the couch). When you not only do it, but you let it be okay (or even good) that you are doing it.
There are still things I haven’t started but I can feel my energy rising, and I am doing more and more (which is also doing less) as time continues. Trusting the process of the transition and myself in the process.
Seeing transition in this new light also reminds me of the other transitions that occur in our lives that this mindset could also prove to be helpful. We have many small transitions throughout our days and weeks, and bigger transitions that occur in our years (and lifetime). Are we approaching these transitions with acknowledgement of their value? Are we being mindful of what we need during the transition – or are we jumping to being in the next phase/activity? Can we give ourselves the permission to actually transition or are we expecting to be fully into the next thing without intentional time and space for the in-between?
If we can see transition as a necessary and valuable space between – how can we best anticipate them, allow space for them, and get the most out of them?