Making Room for What Could Be

When we hold onto ideas of who we are and what our life is (and what it’s going to be) too tightly we become consumed by those stories, leaving little room for anything else.

The way I learned this lesson wasn’t easy, but it has been invaluable. By realizing the constraints that these stories can put on us, we can begin to see beyond them.


For me, having the motherhood card removed from my life was a big blow, but it helped me see other areas of myself that I had long forgotten because I had been so invested in that one story.

For many years I neglected many parts of myself, in fact I didn’t even see a reason to spend any time on them, since they weren’t helping me to complete this one storyline. It really hit home how much I have put aside parts of myself when I realized that most people in my life didn’t even know I enjoyed writing before sharing this blog. It’s funny how much we overshadow when we focus too much on one aspect of ourselves.

And the learning didn’t stop there – in my experience the more you delve into this the more you find. I’ve learned that there are many other ideas about myself and my life that I have been simply taking as truths -not questioning them or the possibility of anything different. Challenging these “truths” has allowed me to see hope for change in areas that I figured I would always be identified with that were certainly making me feel weaker (example: The story that “I’m an anxious person”). Through this process I have learned to let go, or at least loosen my grip, on a lot of the stories I have been holding onto.


Lately I’ve noticed that I have more room to dream, more space for possibility in my life. For the first time in a long time I have a sense of excitement for what I can do with my life. I am starting to see possibility where before I saw dead ends.

Though it wasn’t so much of a “letting go”, as it was life prying it out of my hands, the lesson it taught me has set me free. I am no longer a character passively (or way too desperately) acting out a pre-written plot. Life is now an adventure – and I’m the author.  


The first step to moving forward is being aware that these stories exist, and understanding how investing in these stories affects you (does it make you feel weaker or stronger?). When you stop seeing them as absolute truths, or begin to understand that they are only part of who you are, you can begin to see what else lies beyond them.

I encourage you to take a look at your life and the beliefs you have about yourself; is there anything you are holding onto a bit too tightly? Imagine what might be uncovered if you loosen your grip…


4 thoughts on “Making Room for What Could Be”

  1. I love this post. Love it. It’s so personal but so applicable to anyone’s life. It also makes me think that the tenacity in which you work towards one storyline perceived for yourself, that you then have to change or reimagine, showcases what you are capable of when you have to work towards other store lines instead. In that, when your desired storyline has to change, you can still put all the lessons, thoughts, and energy that you had for another story into whatever comes next. That there is value in the previous experience. I also like that you call things a story. It takes some of the power away from what happens, and implies you, the person, is an author, or able to be an active participant shaping what happens, and how you respond to life as it happens. Thanks for the post. 🙂

    1. Seashines I’m so happy you enjoyed the post and I like what you said about previous experience still having a lot of value in whatever comes next – so so true. I also like how you point out that it’s about how we respond to life, I think often people get very hung up with being helpless to what happens to them in life- instead of seeing the power they always hold- in how we react to what life throws at us. Thank you so much for your continued support!

  2. So well said, makes me want to enter the next chapter of my life with such an open mind and heart! Keep up the amazing work, very proud of you, sending your blog to family members!

    1. Thank you so much Joan! I’m so glad to know it inspires you to live more openly too – I think if we can embrace the uncertainty of not knowing who we are/what life is going to be, it can be truly liberating and create new and exciting possibilities 🙂

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